I just wanna be Ok
Every day at 9am my alarm sounds off "I just wanna be ok, be ok, be ok!" I don't know why I chose that song.... I was trying to get myself to drink more water and I suppose I thought hearing something other than a ding, siren or bell would make me do that. Most days, I chug down a 16 oz water bottle just so I don't have to hear Ingrid Michaelson tell me one more time how she just wants to Be Ok ; )
The funny thing is... every time I chug that water bottle I feel I actually accomplished something. I know that may sound silly but up until about a year ago my water intake was insanely low on a regular basis. I have no idea how I didn't shrivel up to a raisin by the time I was 40! I really don't like the taste of it and I see no need to drink it, I just do because my rational brain knows that we need water to live. I know it's funny but this is truly an effort for me and I am pretty proud of the fact that I am effectively managing to get better at it.
But... there are tons of other things that I miss the mark on daily. And it's easy to count up those things as failures when I tell myself, " I am not spending enough time with my kids, my husband, or reading my bible... I forgot to go grocery shopping this week and the bathroom really needs to be cleaned."
The older my little girl gets, the more I find I have to actually have these conversations out loud because she hears things in her head like, "I didn't do my laundry, clean up my room or remember to empty the dishwasher" and I have to help her dispel the myth of "failure". I can say to her with certainty all the things I know to be right and true- that she is not failing at everything, that progress and balance are what matter and that she is OK as long as she is seeking God. The funny thing is that each time I reassure her, I feel Holy Spirit gently nudge me, reminding me how our Heavenly Father tries to tell me this daily.
God is good and He is always working for us. Sometimes we are only able to hear Him when we need to teach someone else. And that's OK. As parents we were never called to be perfect. We are all a work in progress and as long as we continue to press in, keep our hand to the plow, and don't look back, we are OK. Be encouraged, your best efforts are good enough and when you miss the mark, you're still good enough. Keep on keepin' on my friends- we got this ; )
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A Spirit -filled Christian, wife, mama of 2, artist, entrepreneur, educator and student... always growing .